The worst part is ignoring Olivia while dealing with issues, whether she’s playing around me or sitting next to me at the table eating dinner or whatever, just trying to be a part of my life.

The second worst part is when I close the computer and it takes me way too long to get back to Olivia’s speed, to enjoy the world and life at her pace. After the pager goes off it takes me way too long to get back into a frame of mind where I’m ready to talk to anyone or to be any kind of parent. I’m just useless or worse.

Maybe those are backwards.